What's this?

What's this? What's this?

There's magic in the air!

What do older women want?

Younger men.

Online dating services say women of a certain age want the white-haired gent, as long as he's not too old. Women age 50 and older almost always tell eHarmony.com that they want a younger man -- 10, 15 years younger, sometimes more. And on Match.com, a 50-year-old woman is typically seeking a man who is 48.

"This is going to surprise you," says Craig Wax, senior vice president and general manager of Match.com North America. "It's the woman who is going for the younger guy."

Surprise me? Not at all, thank you very much, I've been screaming from the hilltops for years: The Cougars Reign Supreme!!

Looks like I'm going to need a Match.com account, post-haste-- but really, what's the point? Why isn't there a Cougar.com... wait, what's this? The internet comes through for me again?

Looks like I'm going to have a busy week of signing up for websites and buying prune juice and watermelon by the gallon (both natural aphrodisiacs for the... mature... woman).

You might be wondering, by the way, what I feel about the death of Estelle Getty, of Golden Girl's fame.

Well, she's cute and all, and younger than the other Golden Girls, but anyone with a brain would want to put a hand under Betty White's skirt for a snatch of granny panty.

Hear she's a raunchy one, too.

Oh. And it's sad that Getty died and stuff. But here's a picture of that nasty bitch, Betty:



Tasty.

My mom used to tell me, best place to pick up women in the Supermarket. Singletons abound, like single stalks of wheat ready to be reaped.

Mom was poetic, like that. She wrote an unpublished short story, once.

But me? I'm all about the Pharmacy....

The pharmacy is a veritable playboy mansion of mature cougars, shuffling about in their ballot slippers and orthopedic shoes, looking for their heart medicines and... dare I say it... viagras?

If only those ladies knew.... with a young man, you wouldn't need pills to keep us going. Just a whiff of vix on your neckline and some foot-massage foreplay and an eager beaver like myself can go all night long.

It's natures edict, I tell you.

Young women have ripe wombs for having children but once they hit menopause, their sex drives go through the ROOF-- right when older men are no longer able to perform! Young men, eager, hot to trot but in desperate need of a firm and mature sexual educator, BELONG with an older woman.

It's as if God himself came down from on-high and said, "let there be cougars!" and thus, it was so.

I'm still drooling over that bikini picture of Helen Miren but my cougar of the day is, most certainly, Susan Sarandon.


I love this picture-- it's a single shot, representing all the best aspects of the finest wine, the older woman. Classy, but sexy. She dresses wonderfully, is at the top of her career, yet is mature enough to know exactly what she wants... and how she wants it... and no risk of babies!

Look at the sweet, subtle sag of her breasts... God, what a woman. And only 61!

Just a gigolo, and every where I go....

I'm in love.
This, friends, is Helen "Queen Friggin' Elizabeth" Mirren. And you, too, would fuck her sideways.

source: The Daily Mail online

See, for the longest time, young men such as myself have had to be ashamed of our unabashed admiration for the ripest of berries, the finest of aged wines, the older woman. But today, this very day, I'm going to come out from the linen closet, dust off the moth-ball and hard-candy smell, and proclaim: Cougars are WHERE IT'S AT.

Hence, this blog-- from wrinkliest to the smoothest liver-spots, your Geriatric Gigolo is here to chronicle the tastiest of older morsels.